


If He Dies, He Dies

by surprisepink



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Choking, Cock Rings, Comedy, Hades Video Game Canon Typical Temporary Death, Multi, Pegging, Prompt Fic, Spitroasting, Threesome - F/M/M, bottom Zagreus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:08:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27113773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/surprisepink/pseuds/surprisepink
Summary: Is it really snuff if you're a god?
Relationships: Megaera/Thanatos/Zagreus, Megaera/Zagreus (Hades Video Game), Thanatos/Zagreus (Hades Video Game)
Comments: 43
Kudos: 506
Collections: Hades Kink Meme





	If He Dies, He Dies

**Author's Note:**

> For a [kink meme prompt](https://hadeskinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/741.html?thread=13541#cmt13541)!
>
>> During a smoking hot threesome, things get a little out of hand, and Zag actually dies (choked on Thanatos's dick? strangled by Meg's whip? suffocated while eating Fury pussy?). He wakes up in the Styx, bare ass naked, still hard as steel, and has to do the walk of shame back to his bedroom while the whole House looks on and knows exactly what they've all been getting up to.
>> 
>> Bonus points for Hypnos making one of his ridiculous comments ala "maybe don't get hit so much next time!"

It’s been altogether too long since the three of them have been able to get together—mortals keep dying so Than's always busy, and Meg’s latest performance review says that she’s not meeting her torture quotas—and Zagreus fully intends to savor every moment that they do have. So when he finds Than staring morosely over the Styx and Meg bored enough to be chatting with the head chef, he quite efficiently whisks them both away from their rather dull nights (nights? sure.) and toward his chambers.

He’s known both of them for so long it’s easy to figure out where to go from there: a few corny lines that Meg pretends she doesn’t think are cute, a teasing brush of fingers along the small of Than’s back that makes him shiver. They know what he wants, and what _they_ want; the flirting and the coy invitations are really just window dressing.

Soon enough he’s exactly where he wants to be: his back is flush against Thanatos’ chest while Megaera explores every bit of his body with her long fingernails. His hips roll involuntarily when she reaches a nipple and pinches it between her fingers, but Thanatos stills him with strong hands.

“Stay there,” Than murmurs into Zagreus’ ear with that husky voice of his. “Be a good boy for Megaera.” Easy for him to say—he’s still fully clothed, and nobody is trying to tease _him_ into coming early the way Meg likes to do. Still, Zagreus can feel Than's cock quickly stiffening beneath his robe, and he has to smile at the way Than gets hard just watching Zagreus enjoy himself.

“Yeah— ah, more of that, Than,” Zagreus says, barely coherent in between gasps. What he wants to say is that he’ll be good if Megaera will be, too, but he can’t manage the words, not when Meg’s doing her best to tease him without giving him what he needs. Instead of going downward, her hands have reached his neck, and she strokes it with a feather-light touch.

She’s at once testing his reaction and reminding him that now she holds both his pleasure and his life in his hands. “Stop talking for once, Zagreus. Or I’ll have to stop _this_. You don’t want that, do you?” Again her fingers brush against the vulnerable flesh, harder this time and lingering longer. He can breathe fine, or the equivalent thereof, but it makes him feel lightheaded nonetheless.

He stops talking. He’s learned that when Meg tells him what she intends on doing, she means it.

Perhaps in the interest of distracting him but more likely taking any opportunity to lavish attention on him, Thanatos takes Zagreus’ chin in his hand and tips his head back to kiss him firmly. Zagreus does his best to be quiet, as commanded, but it’s hard to do when Than is kissing him like this while Meg is finally freeing his erection. The kiss itself is chaste enough—they can only do so much at this angle—but it’s slow and somehow sensual and makes him ache for more.

Megaera could do anything to him now, lost as he is in Than’s kisses, and she takes full advantage of the opportunity. As Thanatos teases his mouth open, tugs at his lip with skillful teeth, Zagreus can feel Meg tug at his cock. He’s surprised for a moment that she’s doing something as simple as jacking him off—Meg’s not really into that, she usually makes Than take care of it—but it quickly becomes apparent that isn’t her goal. Instead of skin against skin, Zagreus instead feels something slim but snug being stretched around the base of his cock and behind his balls.

Meg brought him another gift! How thoughtful.

He can’t _help_ but groan as Megaera brings him to full hardness with a few more strokes, the cock ring not restraining him but certainly making things more interesting. His body is buzzing with arousal, but neither Meg nor Than seems interested in making him come for a good long while—and that suits Zagreus just fine.

Thanatos’ hands have found their way to rest on Zagreus’ thighs, which makes it harder to kiss but very easy for him to spread Zagreus’ legs apart. Zagreus allows himself to go limp, to fall against Thanatos’ chest, open and vulnerable.

“You look so cute when you’re exposed like this. Such an easy target,” Meg says with the same gleam in her eyes as she gets when she’s about to best him in combat. “Let’s see how much more you can take.”

“Anything you can give me,” Zagreus replies, confident even though all of this. There’s nothing that Thanatos and Megaera can do to him that he won’t gladly accept.

“We’ll see about that,” says Thanatos.

“Thought I told you to shut up,” says Megaera, reaching under the bed to dig around for something. “That goes for the both of you. And Zagreus—you _really_ need to clean up this mess.”

Despite her protests, she finds what she’d been searching for: a bottle of oil, finest you can find in the underworld and probably anywhere else. Zagreus looks on in approval as she opens it, more than ready for what she’s planning, then shivers at the feeling of the oil, as cold as something can be down here, poured onto his asshole. He’ll look past her delivery method for now; it’s easy to forgive her wastefulness when she’s already fitting two fingers inside of him all at once.

A jolt runs through his body and he winces at the sudden sensation, rough and almost painful. “Good boy,” Thanatos whispers, stroking his thigh, content as always to sit back and observe Zagreus’ pain and pleasure.

Meg moves fast when she wants to and slow when Zagreus _doesn’t_ want her to, and now she’s scissoring her fingers inside of him achingly slow. He can take so much more than this, but he won’t ask for it—that’ll just make her torture him with waiting twice as long. Instead, he rolls his hips to meet each of her motions, until he feels like he’s about to explode.

Than could easily touch his cock to offer him some relief, but instead he waits for Zagreus to ask for it. Zagreus doesn’t. He wants more, but he doesn’t want it to be _over_ , not yet. Still, it feels like he’s far away from coming; the way the cock ring restricts his blood flow so deliciously must mean it’s some kind of mortal invention. He’ll have to ask about it later, maybe let Aphrodite know that whoever came up with it deserves a place in Elysium.

Soon enough, Thanatos and Megaera flip him rather unceremoniously onto his stomach, ass in the air. Zagreus can feel Meg’s touch leave him, and he’s about to object when Than pushes his thumb into Zagreus’ mouth. He takes it gladly, even hums around it as Thanatos adds another finger, than a third, to fuck his mouth gently. A shame he can’t see Than’s face from here; Zagreus knows well that he could watch his subtle reactions as he shamelessly takes all that he has to give for hours.

For now, though, he’ll have to content himself with the sound of Thanatos’ soft gasps as Zagreus runs his tongue around his fingers, suckles them, takes them in deeper until he’s almost choking. He can hear a rustling of fabric, though he doesn’t think much of it until Than drags his fingers across his tongue, removes them with a wonderfully wet sound.

Are they going to make him beg? He’s empty on both sides now and he longs to be _filled_ —but for tonight Thanatos must be feeling nice, because instead of making Zagreus wait he pulls out his cock, hard and leaking precome. He looks delicious like this, robe wrinkled and body more than ready to be pleasured. Zagreus is happy to indulge in the offer, and he takes Than’s tip into his mouth eagerly. It’s a different sort of stretch than his fingers, and heavier against his tongue, but equally familiar.

Zagreus’ own cock strains against the ring as he accepts more of Than’s. It’s brushing against the sheets just right to provide a pleasant teasing, and even though it feels like he _could_ come even with the ring around it, he’s still nowhere close. Idly, he wonders how many times they could each take him before he finishes even once. Certainly wouldn’t be a bad way to distract them from their jobs for the time being.

Thanatos weaves his fingers through Zagreus’ hair, pulling him even closer, forcing him to take in just a little more of his length. He’s muttering something, sweet words between moans that Zagreus can’t really understand, not when the task at hand is so enrapturing. And certainly not when he hears the sound of Megaera returning, sitting on the bed.

“Nice job, figured out how to make him stop talking,” she says. As Than chuckles in agreement, Zagreus can feel her positioning himself between his legs, forcing his ass higher. It’s obvious what she’s planning, especially when she pours more oil onto him, into him. His cock twitches with excitement, strains against the ring as he feels the thick phallus she’s donned pressing against his asshole.

Megaera doesn’t like to tease him open the way that Thanatos does. Now that he’s slick and ready for her, she pushes inside of him all at once, and the only reason Zagreus doesn’t scream loud enough to wake the dead is because Than’s cock is stopping him. All Zagreus can do as Meg pulls her hips back and thrusts into him again, just as rough as before, is curl his fingers into the sheets and brace himself. He lets himself be taken on both sides, finally filled completely, just the way he needs.

Thanatos may play nice with Zagreus the way Megaera never has, but he’s no gentler than she is when he’s really enjoying himself, and Zag is thankful for it. He’s got Zagreus’ hair in a vice grip, forcing him to almost choke on his cock. Tears well up in the corners of Zagreus’ eyes from the intensity, but it feels so damn good to be held in place and used like this, where he couldn’t leave even if he wanted to.

He feels hands around his throat—Meg’s? Than’s? he’s not sure, and it doesn’t matter—and it’s so much and he’s _so_ close as both of his lovers take everything they want from him. It’s absolute bliss, like he’s floating away, he’s so lightheaded, and—

And then all at once he feels nothing except a familiar warmth and wetness against his naked body.

Familiar, that is when he is fully clothed and has been out of the House but has just...

Died.

Blood and darkness.

Zagreus forces himself to keep his eyes closed and count to ten. He’s got to be wrong, right? He can’t possibly be in the Pool of Styx _now_ , all that happened was that he got choked a little bit and that wouldn’t _kill_ him.

Usually.

If he’s died it was by far the most pleasant time he’s ever had doing it, and given how often he dies an easier death is usually more than welcome. But he’s still naked except for the cock ring and his laurels and very much still hard, and... well, he’d prefer to stay here and ignore the world forever, instead of face the entire House like this, thanks.

After a long moment of denial, Zagreus sighs and forces himself to get out of the pool, taking a towel to wrap around himself on his way out. (Not such a bad investment after all, eh?) Around him, shades stare in what he assumes is confusion, though they’re not very expressive so he supposes it could be something else. As formal mortals, they no doubt know that the gods work in mysterious ways—he can just act like this is normal and they won’t ask any questions. Probably.

Unfortunately, he can’t expect the same of Hypnos, who _of course_ is awake and focused on his job for just about the first time in his life. Zagreus pretends not to hear him in hysterics as he reads over his list.

“Asphyxiation? That’s not one I see every day!” he says, loud enough for the entire room to hear. Zagreus cringes, walks faster. “Have you considered, I don’t know, _not_ letting yourself get choked to death? I hear it’s more fun when you don’t die!”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Zagreus mutters. Some of the shades are averting their eyes but most are staring openly and a few are laughing along with Hypnos. Father has apparently stepped away, which explains why so many of them are loitering here.

As he rushes back, Zagreus curses all that created him because he’s _blushing_ , which is somehow more humiliating than being buck-naked in the middle of the House. Achilles is standing at his post, very pointedly pretending not to see Zagreus; he’ll have to thank him for it later and then promptly never speak of it again.

For once, he doesn’t pause to pet Cerberus, an omission that makes his leftmost head whine.

Zagreus has never been more grateful to be back in his chambers than he is at this very moment. The embarrassment of being murdered by those damn sewer rats _again_ has nothing on that of every soul this side of Tartarus knows what he gets up to in his free time.

“Thanks,” he says flatly as he enters. Both Meg and Than are still here, the former filing her nails and the latter flipping through something he must have grabbed from the bookshelf. Thanatos looks like he’s soft, and Zagreus can’t help but wonder if he got off to choking him to death.

That would be... interesting. And not exactly uncharacteristic of the god of death, Zagreus supposes.

“Oh, you’re back,” Meg says, almost bored. He shouldn’t be surprised; it’s not exactly the first time she’s killed him. “That was more fun than the normal way.”

Zagreus collapses onto the bed between them, somehow still rock-hard but mentally and emotionally spent.

He supposes there are worse ways to die, all things considered.

**Author's Note:**

> "Can Zagreus choke?" I ask myself, and then decide nobody is going to care enough to call me out on it.
> 
> If for some reason this makes you want to follow my fic twitter it's [here](https://twitter.com/surprisepink_).


End file.
